July 29th, 2005 by POMP

Since I’m in blog rerun mode, I figured I’d post one more. I originally posted this wickedly funny South Park joke way back in April of 2004. Ahh, the good old days … Here’s an edited excerpt:

“This perfect little South Park moment is from a movie called ‘The Aristocrats’ that will be out later this year. It’s a movie by Penn Jillette and Paul Provenza. It’s 100 comedians telling the same fucking dirty filthy fucking cunt-snot joke over and over. This South Park clip is not even in the top 10 for dirtiest. Personally, I can’t fucking wait to see it.”

Anyway, The Aristocrats didn’t open in 2004; it opened last night in select cities. So check out the South Park joke, and then check out IFILM for more video from the movie – including high-res versions of the South Park joke.

July 29th, 2005 by POMP

I’ve written so much shit over the years, that I’ve forgotten all about most of it. Such was the case with this letter I wrote in June of 2002 to the National Organization for Women. At the time Grand Theft Auto III was all the rage and this lesbian-filled, Nazi Organization for Women was trying to get GTA pulled from store shelves because they said it glorified violence and degraded women – like that’s a bad thing.

Three years later this letter seems kind of relevant again, given the recent “Hot Coffee” controversy – so I figured I would repost it. WARNING: There’s a lot of words and stuff, so if you don’t like that kind of thing you may want to leave now…

Although “GTA 3″ is rated for “mature” players only (17 and up), it has been widely reported that younger kids are getting their hands on it. This is EXCELLENT, as I believe it will help deter the youth of the nation from engaging in real-life physical acts of violence, either at home or in school.

We defenders of “GTA 3″ have suggested that critics of the game lighten up. Here’s what they SHOULD lighten up about: The game player works for the mafia, which involves killing people, including police officers and innocent bystanders, stealing cars and doing drugs. When the player begins to lose his health, he can pick up a prostitute on the street and have sex with her to make his health go back up. If he wants his money back, the player can run after the prostitute, beat her to death and recover his cash. People who have played the game say that the beating is bloody and done with a baseball bat that you can feel in your hands through the controller. Is that GREAT or what!? Technology sure has come a long way.

As video games get more real looking and feeling, and the players gain more control over the situations, one has to ask whether we aren’t “training” kids in violence, as has been suggested by moronic medical professionals, (who have undoubtedly been bought and paid for by fascist organizations such as N.O.W.) and the military, who must love the idea of “training” kids for violence. This will rapidly increase the rate at which they can send your kids off to die on foreign soil, so we can all save a nickel on gas. Video games are much different than TV or movies where the characters are independent from the viewers. In video games the players themselves are the ones committing the violent acts. Thus, alleviating the everyday anguish they are subjected to by the likes of liberal organizations such as N.O.W. and the media, with its never-ending, graphic depictions of the “War on Terrorism.” Why is it that seeing the WTC collapse 1000 times isn’t bad for our children (or even the crucifixion of Jesus Christ), but violence in video games must be stopped? What video games was Hitler playing as a youth?

The game is just a fantasy some say. But N.O.W. asks how many young men fantasized about picking up and beating to death a hooker before this game suggested the idea? I say, probably many, that’s why banning this game is as stupid as suggesting that a group of lesbians, such as the one’s in N.O.W. should be advocating censorship and trying to limit my freedom of speech.

Even if violent games like “GTA 3″ do have a direct effect on our behavior, companies such as Take Two Interactive and Sony Computer Entertainment should NOT be ashamed to be making money off of this entertaining form of “play”.

N.O.W. asks you to immediately withdraw this product from store shelves and discontinue selling and marketing this “game” which they alledge encourages violence toward and the degradation of women. That is their fascist decree. I ask that you deport any treasonous individuals that would dare limit the rights of others, simply because of their own personal beliefs. That is my democratic decree.

July 28th, 2005 by POMP

How many 12 ounce cans of soda would it take to kill you? To find out, just click this link, pick your poison, and enter your weight.

According to the site, it would take more than 250 cans of Coca-Cola Classic to kill me, or just one line of poisoned coke from a filthy Muslim. I’m sure a shotgun blast to the head would do the trick too, but these days I prefer the Death by Budweiser method.

However, given the fact that there’s only about 50 milligrams of caffeine in a can of Coke, and 200 milligrams in a Vivarin, and I used to take one to two sheets a day (8-16 pills), I must conclude that I’m invincible. Of course, I failed tenth grade math five times, and here’s why…

I was such a Vivarin addict back in my high school days that I would steal boxes of them from Fay’s Drugs, and then in order to not get caught with them in class, I would suck on them like candy or for a quick buzz I would chew the fuckers. Then I’d bounce off the walls all day long and rather than do my school work, I would write insane ramblings similar to my earlier work on POMP PRODUCTIONS – except these rhymed.

Keep in mind that these Vivarin’s were not chewable either. If I had to describe their taste, it would be dehydrated puke. Just add saliva, and you have a delicious treat with a lingering aftertaste that lasts all day!

July 28th, 2005 by POMP

Stile says, “Here’s a wicked 230 meg porn vid for y’all… this chick is so god damn hot. I would lick her asshole all night. You need the XviD codec to watch.”

Click this link for the vid.

July 26th, 2005 by POMP

The best religion on earth nails one out of the park again. Using their keen intellect and common sense, hard-line Islamic clerics have ordered a rape victim to marry her rapist.
(Link…)

Just remember, a towel is not a hat … Derka Derk, Mohammed Jihad!

July 24th, 2005 by POMP

Today I finally got around to installing some Google Extensions for Firefox. I’m not a big fan of the Google Toolbar though, and I hardly think that it’s a “powerful new tool.” Mainly because after you get rid of the built-in Firefox Search bar, you can’t drag the Google Toolbar into its place. You can’t use my “open sores” Firefox Search Plugin with it either, so it just ends up wasting valuable screen real-estate. These are pathetic reasons (I know), but I’m very picky about the way my software is setup, and the look and feel of my wonderful Windows XP install.

But I do like the other two Google Extensions: Send to Phone allows you to send text messages of webpage content to your mobile phone, and Google Suggest auto-completes search terms that you enter in the Firefox Search bar. I think most Firefox Extensions suck, but these are both really cool.

Now if only Google would get back to work on making their damn search engine good again…

July 24th, 2005 by POMP

What would you do for a Roady2?